Palettes- a Mixtape

Sometimes, whilst trolling the internet for inspiration, I like to hit certain sites just to get mad at their pandering, fabsugaresque writing disguised as cutting-edge fashion journalism ("What do you think?" Who cares?). Anyway this trolling is what led me to this post on the "Gift Palette," which is when makeup companies throw together some coordinating and/ or limited shades of paints and gussy them up with some glitzy packaging. I agree with the posters in that this is a superfluous and overpriced gimmick. But on principal I love a palette! I've always wished there were one that I could buy pre-filled with all my favorite lip colors, shadows and maybe a concealer and a lipbalm so that I could eliminate some dead weight from my ginormous makeup bag. Makeup artists always customize their own palettes, so this year I decided to do the same thing as a gift. See, it's different from the ones that you can buy from Sephora because I have little to no brand loyalty, and also I know which shades to recommend to my recipients because I practically know them! Haha! Sound like a plan? You should make one. My fave trick is to melt the lipsticks by putting the palette in the sun for a while and then refrigerating it so they're all smooth and professional looking. But also my ankle bracelet electrocutes me if I try to leave the house, so I have time for stuff like that.

I've been trapped inside my tiny office deep in Greenpoint being all broke and scholarly so I haven't been able to investigate the newest edition to the bourgeoisie shopping warehouse behemoth that houses YLLI and Woodley & Bunny on Driggs and North 10th. It's in the basement and its all full of shiny products, is it some sort of mega salon? A Realty-Pilates-Art-Gallery?" Please inform.

Being stuck indoors has led me to precious little insight that you readers could actually put to use ("OMFG! My moisturizing hand soap looks like lotion now that I put it in this non-descript container! And my facewash might be mistaken for hand soap as it is also in an ambiguously elegant container! Wait no one ever visits me cuz it's too far to walk in 30 degree weather!"), but I did manage to do a little holiday party makeup research in a rare visit to the outside world yesterday. In my ongoing effort to provide you with the best in glitter makeup, I discovered that Sue Devitt has a really good array of glittery roll-on eyeshadow that is perfect for all skin types. The hues are mostly neutral and very glittery, and the (recyclable) roll-on packaging makes it manageable, even portable. $18 each. If you have the oily skin, try blotting it with a blotting paper every once and a while to keep it from creasing.

Also, thanks for the all submissions for the guy-beauty issue, keep em' coming.